Applesoldier's Little Piece Of The Web.
Plaintiff: Carl Sagan, world-famous astronomer.
Defendant: Apple Computer, Inc.
In 1993 one of the project managers of a certain personal computer decided to use “Carl Sagan” for the internal code name of the project. The name would not be released to the public and was thought to be a token of respect, but when Carl found out about it, he sued, complaining that it was, “an illegal usurption of his name for commercial purposes” and demanded it be changed.
The project manager did as he was asked, changing the code name to BHA (Butt-Head Astronomer). When Sagan learned of the name change, he filed suit again for libel, infliction of emotional distress and several other butt-headed things.
The verdict: Apple won.
In her ruling, the judge eloquently explained that “one does not seriously attack the expertise of a scientist using the undefined phrase ‘butt-head’.”
The beauty of our justice system at work.
Bill: "There are a few issues we need to discuss." Contractor: "Ah, you have our basic support option. Calls are free for the first 90 days and $75 a call thereafter. Okay?" Bill: "Uh, yeah... the first issue is the living room. We think its a little smaller than we anticipated." Contractor: "Yeah. Some compromises were made to have it out by the release date." Bill: "We won't be able to fit all our furniture in there." Contractor: "Well, you have two options. You can purchase a new, larger living room; or you can use a Stacker." Bill: "Stacker?" Contractor: "Yeah, it allows you to fit twice as much furniture into the room. By stacking it, of course, you put the entertainment center on the couch... the chairs on the table... etc. You leave an empty spot, so when you want to use some furniture you can unstack what you need and then put it back when you're done." Bill: "Uh... I dunno... issue two. The second issue is the light fixtures. The bulbs we brought with us from our old home won't fit. The threads run the wrong way." Contractor: "Oh! That's easy. Those bulbs aren't plug and play. You'll have to upgrade to the new bulbs." Bill: "And the electrical outlets? The holes are round, not rectangular. How do I fix that?" Contractor: "Just uninstall and reinstall the electrical system." Bill: "You're kidding!?" Contractor: "Nope. Its the only way." Bill: " Well... I have one last problem. Sometimes, when I have guests over, someone will flush the toilet and it won't stop. The water pressure drops so low that the showers don't work." Contractor: "That's a resource leakage problem. One fixture is failing to terminate and is hogging the resources preventing access from other fixtures." Bill: "And how do I fix that?" Contractor: "Well, after each flush, you all need to exit the house, turn off the water at the street, turn it back on, reenter the house and then you can get back to work." Bill: "That's the last straw. What kind of product are you selling me?" Contractor: "Hey, if you don't like it nobody made you buy it." Bill: "And when will this be fixed?" Contractor: "Oh, in your next house -- which will be ready to release sometime near the end of next year. Actually it was due out this year, but we've had some delays..."The following is a conversation overheard as Bill Gates was moving into his new house...
And LO! The Lord of the OS did come down among His sheep and He did sayeth, Thou Shalt Pay Steve Jobs, and he will deleverith unto you my product. I am OSX, your GUI. Thou shalt not have false GUI's on machines before me. And the Lord said, "32 bit applications are evil! I am sorry I ever created them. I shall destroy them all and start over. Thou shalt all buy new computers." And the prophet Intel came forward and said, "But Lord, what about backwards compatibility?" And Lo! the Lord became angry and said, "Compatibility is irrelevant. You will be assimilated." And the consumers gathered around Steve Jobs and the tower of Apple, and they asked, "Prophet, how much must we spend on salvation? Seven times our investment?" And Steve turned to the crowd and he said unto them, "Nay, consumers, you must not spend seven times your investment, but rather only 2 times your investment. Only then shall you be saved." And the consumers did as they were told. And the Lord said unto them, "I tell you this, it is easier for Alice Cooper to enter the gates of heaven than for a Pentium to run Windows95." And as the masses came forward, I saw inscribed upon their heads OSX. And the Prophet Steve, for that is who it must have been, he raised his right hand, and broke the first seal, saying, "Behold, the seal of Apple. By the breaking of this seal you are bound unto whatever the contract within may say." And as the seal was broken, all the great empires around the world were set before apple. And lo, the Prophet Stevel held up the scroll and said, "Behold, the second seal! I shall not break it today, but rather I shalt break it soon, like perhaps next week, or maybe the week thereafter. Thou shalt wait expectantly for its breaking and shalt not produce any other work until that time shall come."
(Source unknown), I just thought it was funny.
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